meltdown

after night 8 of no sleeping due to the pains that seem to disappear in the day, i was not in the best frame of mind yesterday and cried when Huw had to go to work (tired and emotional??). Huw took the afternoon off to come and see the consultant with me that afternoon. As soon as the midwife told me i looked tired and asked if i was ok, i started crying, then had a fantastic meltdown for the rest of the afternoon even crying in the waiting room - embarassing! by the time i got to see the consultant i was a little bit of an emotional wreck. He was lovely as always and scanned the baby straight away. He had a registrar training with him, who was also pregnant, bet she looked at me and thought 'shit, this is what ive got to look forward to!!!'
once scanned he asked me a few questions such as when exactly was Mia born, forceps? what did she weigh? then he said that he was going to 'start me off' as the waters were borderline?? and the baby wasnt moving as much as she'd used to - which to be honest, at this stage, i thought was normal.
the registrar gave me a sweep. hhmmmm, shop is definitely shut after this baby is all i will say.
had a better night sleep and dosed myself up on paracetamol, i only  really woke up when they had worn off and took some more as my back feels like the back of an 80year old!
anyway, i'm keeping my fingers crossed for that to work, but if not im booked in to be induced tomorrow morning, its a week early but i couldnt be more grateful, im done with pregnancy. so keeping my fingers crossed for today as being home for as long as possible is definitely my preferred option to being induced for 24 hours. hospitals are full of sick people!!